Hey Mikey, He Likes It

Two teenage boys were waiting in line at the soft pretzel cart.
"Is Mikey coming?"
"I called him up and he said he was grounded."

"What for?"

"He said cause he hooked up with 6 girls."

They're really 60 year old dwarfs.

A pack of 13-year old cool kids were walking. One was adjusting himself. The other calls: "Hey Sully, why don't you stick your whole hand down there?"

Still messing with the four inches of Tweetiebird shorts killroying themselves out of his Levi's, he yells back in the most New York way, "My boxers fuggin' itch, whatayawant me to do about it?"